


Pussy Whipped

by remarkable1



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Avenger Loki (Marvel), Cats, Clint Barton is a Butthole, Drinking, F/M, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Innuendo, Jane Foster & Darcy Lewis Friendship, Jane Foster is a Good Bro (Marvel), Kissing, Loki (Marvel) Does What He Wants, Loki (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Protective Thor (Marvel), Revenge, Summer Vacation, Teasing, Thor (Marvel) is Not Stupid, Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Water
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:07:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25395862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/remarkable1/pseuds/remarkable1
Summary: While on vacation with the entire team, Thor witnesses his brother being teased by a fellow Avenger. He warns the offender, but Loki holds his own when he gets petty, public revenge on the perpetrator. Light-hearted, pranks, comeuppance, a little meanness, lots of fun and friends.
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Thor, Jane Foster/Loki
Comments: 3
Kudos: 49
Collections: Christmas in July 2020





	Pussy Whipped

A fun little piece written for the Christmas in July 2020 fest.

Pairing: Thor/Darcy Lewis

Location: Siam Park, Spain Waterpark

Summer Word Prompt: Strawberry Daiquiri 

Summary: A petulant Loki causes a little mischief for fellow Avengers after they have some fun at his expense. 

[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/189194219@N08/50164754022/in/dateposted-public/)

The private jet flew smoothly through the clear skies over the ocean. Onboard, the intrepid Avengers crew readied themselves for departure as the pilot announced they were getting ready to land.

“Hey Loki, I think your bridle needs some adjustment. I can see some wrinkles forming around your mouth where it’s pulled too tight.”

Clint and Sam both snickered at the sourpuss glare thrown their way.

“What’s the matter, scientist got your tongue?” Sam quipped right after Clint, and now they did double over, laughing uproariously.

“I do not find your banal little quips amusing, mortals. If you wish to keep your tongues in your mouths, both will shut them PROMPTLY!” Loki snarled, beginning to rise just as Clint pulled a handgun, and Sam started to backpedal a little bit.

Thor’s big arm stretched across the center, blocking his brother’s advance and also warning the others with a hard stare. “Loki is an Avenger now. Your personal feelings aside, we are still a team and must act professionally toward one another if we cannot harbor peace. It is the only way we will continue to function.”

“I do not need your ‘help’ brother,” Loki snarled, his face instantly softening when Jane appeared from the back of the plane where the ladies had been having a few drinks and a gossip session.

“Dearest.”

“I heard some commotion up here. Is everything alright?”

Glancing around nervously, she didn’t miss the way Thor’s arm lowered suddenly, and the two other male Avengers present looked sheepishly guilty.

“Yes, of course. I was just coming back to check and see if your drink needed refreshment.”

“Oh, that’s so sweet! Come on. You can show me how to make this, whatever it is,” Jane smiled, shaking her empty glass at Loki, eyes only for him now.

The lovestruck pair disappeared into the small kitchenette, no doubt, to do a little more than ‘make a drink.’

Thor raised a warning finger to the pair. “If you ruin this trip by provoking Loki, or worse, get him kicked off the team, I will personally hold the pair of you responsible. Have I made myself clear?”

Clint fought back the urge to rolled his eyes but did clear his throat and nodded tersely. “Yep. Crystal.”

“Same,” Sam muttered, looking like he wanted to be anywhere but there.

Annoyed there was already trouble, Thor noticed the roiling thunderheads forming around the plane and headed up to the cabin. “My apologies, Captain, I will clear these shortly.”

The surprised man turned towards the thunder god and smiled. “Thank you, sir. Sure does make the landing a lot easier without a raging thunderstorm.”

“Aye,” Thor said, backing out and seating himself with his girlfriend up front. “It does.”

“What’s going on?” Darcy stage-whispered.

“I’ll tell you later,” Thor whisper-shouted back.

Knowing better than to argue in a confined space, she hugged his heavily muscled arm and settled in for their descent.

\--

Siam Waterpark, Spain

Darcy’s eyes were huge and round, taking in the sights and sounds of the enormous, famous water park. Her attention was everywhere. “I don’t know what I want to try first! This place is amazing!” she gushed.

Thor smiled down at her, giving Jane a little wink over Darcy’s head, who grinned back. Loki, as sour as ever, scowled in Thor’s direction.

“Try whatever you like, little one. We have the whole park to ourselves,” Thor gestured grandly.

Indeed, Tony had gone all-out and reserved the entire thing for one day, and invited about a hundred of his closest friends, of course, all expenses paid. It was a thank-you for the whole team and all they had done for Stark Industries and the whole saving the world bit. Plus, he might have been feeling a bit magnanimous or drunk at the time. Or both, he couldn’t remember. Still, it was worth the expense to see the look on his friends’ faces when he’d told them.

Darcy saw one of the slides she’d read about and squealed. “Oh, look! Let’s go on that one! Jane, Loki, come on, you have to join us, it’s for up to four riders at a time!”

Loki looked like he was going to protest, but one excited tug from Jane, and he meekly followed the women, giving Thor a, “what are you going to do?” look.

Thor was delighted Loki had found love with the lovely Jane. It had done wonders for his disposition.

Behind them a ways, a sudden cracking sound rang out and raucous laughter. Loki’s soft countenance disappeared immediately. “I’m going to murder them,” he muttered.

“What was that?” Jane asked, stopping and turning. Clint, Sam, Nat, and Wanda walked by, and Clint stared right at Loki defiantly, made a little whipping motion, and clacked his tongue. “G’yup!”

“Knock it off!” Sam hissed at his friend, elbowing Clint in the side.

“Fine, let’s go.”

Nat pinched Clint on the ass just as Wanda stepped on his toes. “Quit ganging up on me!” he whined, moving away.

“You’re just making this worse for yourself,” Nat reprimanded him.

Gobsmacked, Darcy narrowed her eyes and looked up at her boyfriend, then over at Loki. “Does someone wanna explain to me what’s going on? Cuz I don’t like being left in the dark.”

“I am going to murder him slowly, in his sleep. Squeeze his innards out his arse,” Loki threatened.

Jane slapped his arm. “No killing people! You promised!” she griped, and he smirked at her.

“Oh, alright. I would prefer avoiding their group, however. The bird has done nothing but irritate me from the moment we left the compound.”

“Aye. Agreed.”

“But, we were supposed to meet up with them for Strawberry Daqeuiris later!” Darcy wheedled, marching ahead again.

“Sorry, love, we’ll have to keep it to the four of us. I do not want my brother, or any of our comrades, holiday ruined due to friend Clint’s immature teasing.”

“Will you two stop talking about me as if I were a non-entity? Come, love, let us go on this insipid ride you are all so keen to kill yourselves upon, and then we can find somewhere more – private – to spend a little time together, hm, my sweet little scientist?”

Jane giggled, and Darcy made a gagging motion.

After they finished their ride, Loki and Jane did, indeed, disappear, no doubt, for a little bit of sexytime shenanigans.

“Okay, fess up, Thunderbomb,” Darcy snarked. She made Thor pay for three Strawberry Daquiris – two for herself and one for him, to make up for the lack of company and lack of forthcoming juicy gossip.

Sighing in defeat, Thor confided, “The owner of the waterpark’s wife is infatuated with my brother. When Lady Pepper put forth inquiry into where we should go on holiday, the owner set up a deal with Tony to close the park if his wife got to meet Loki face to face.”

“No. Fucking. Way!” Darcy exclaimed, already finishing her first Daquiri, then grabbing her head sharply. “Ow! Ice headache!”

Oblivious, Thor continued. “Of course, Loki was appalled and wanted nothing to do with it. Then the lovely Jane heard of the possible excursion and was so very excited at the prospect of coming here. She convinced Loki it was worth the humiliation of ‘lowering himself to appease an insipid mortal,’” he mimed in his brother’s voice, making Darcy laugh.

“I still don’t get why Clint’s teasing him so much.”

“Sam was present. He relayed the conversation to the rest of the team.”

“No way!” Darcy said, and Thor exclaimed back in the trained way she’d taught him, “Yes, way!” very enthusiastically.

“I can’t believe I missed all of that! Damn, I would have paid to be a fly on the wall for that.”

“It was not pretty. I am glad you were not present.”

“Why? Did Loki blow everything to shit?”

“No, he did not ‘blow everything to shit.’ However, he did vanish Sam’s clothing and was put on temporary probation despite being provoked.”

“Shit. No wonder he’s pissed off.”

Darcy finished her second Daiquiri with alarming speed, hiccoughing at the onslaught of extra alcohol that had been added in.

“Ever since that incident, friend Clint has been insinuating that Jane has my brother – ‘pussy whipped?’ is how she coined the term.”

Barking a laugh, Darcy couldn’t help but almost puke up the drinks she’d downed, she busted a gut so hard. When she was through, she explained to Thor the whip, bridle, bit, and nine yards of what it meant. When she was finished, he was more pissed off than even Loki, possibly.

“If what you say is true, and I believe you, then I do not blame my brother for whatever mayhem he may wreak upon our teammates, no matter the trouble. I will stand by him.”

“Good – good on you,” Darcy hiccoughed.

“Come, my love, you have had quite enough.”

“I wanna go on the tornado!”

“We have three full days to enjoy the park. What YOU need is a nap, dearest. It was not wise to imbibe so much alcohol on an empty stomach.”

By the time Thor carried her back to the shuttle and hotel room, she was dead asleep from jetlag and being drunk.

The following morning, Darcy woke snuggled in her boyfriend’s arms. She couldn’t believe she’d snoozed away the rest of the previous afternoon, evening, and entire night until she remembered how horrid her jetlag had been going from the states to England and again.

Snuggling in deeper, she was about to drift off when a little persistent beep from her phone sounded. Reaching behind her to grab it off the headboard top, she thumbed the screen and clicked on the notification. A silent video popped up, captions already enabled, and her mouth dropped into a literal O. Biting her lower lip, she decided her best course of action was to do nothing at all.

If anyone needed to get a hold of them, they knew their hotel and room number. Thor was a hefty sleeper when he traveled, as well, and she had no inclination to wake up her snoring furnace when her body still felt weary.

She kept Thor out of the loop about what she’d seen that morning, cheerily consuming her in-bed breakfast, well, luncheon since it was noon before they got rolling, and a lazy quickie and shower before they met up with Jane and Loki. At least, they were supposed to meet up with Jane and Loki.

A quick knock on their door and peek inside had Thor quickly turning bright red and swiftly but quietly shutting it.

“I don’t understand why Loki keeps the door cracked open when he is – otherwise engaged,” he said lowly in answer to Darcy’s questioning look.

“What?” she asked, and he shushed her, pulling her away as she protested. “But we were supposed to, Thor, stop! What are you doing?”

Thor wanted to pull a hand down his face in exasperation. Darcy could be the thick one in the relationship sometimes. “They were having sex,” he told her baldly once they'd reached the elevators, gotten inside, and the door closed.

“Oh. OH! I mean, oh, well, alright. I guess that means our plans are out the window. What do you want to do instead?”

“I do not understand. You said yesterday you wanted to return to the water park. I am taking us down to the lobby for refreshments and next door for supplies you said you needed. Was that not the plan?”

Darcy thought back to the little newsreel that morning and frantically thought quickly. “Um, well, yeah, but I changed my mind. It’s no fun without Loki and Jane.”

Thor did not understand Midgardian females, least of all the twisty mind of one Darcy Lewis. “May I ask what precipitated this twist of plans?” he asked politely to which she quickly shut him down.

“No, you may not.”

His mouth opening and then snapping shut, he just gawked after darcy, knowing better than to argue. He tilted his head slightly to the side, admiring the view of her backside, thoroughly distracted now. Well then. If she didn’t want to ride the water amusements, he’d give her a ride of his own she’d never forget.

If Thor had been a villain in a comedy, he’d have twirled his mustache if he’d had one.

“Come ON! There’s a liquor store a few shops down. I’ve been dying to try out a few bottles of the local wines.”

“Very well. And then?”

“Hm. Well, and then you’ll just have to wait and see, won’t you?” she teased, turning quickly into his arms and walking her fingers up his chest.

“Oh, ho. I see. Come, little one. Let us not forget the strawberry daiquiri mix you so covet. I can think of several things I’d like to smother in it and lick it off.”

“I like the sound of that, Thor Odinson.”

At least their afternoon and evening was a memorable one, and they still had plenty of time left on holiday to enjoy the attractions.

Over at Siam Park, Clint and Sam stood perched high on top of an attraction, hundreds of cats crowding ‘round the base, reporters swarming and local animal control desperately failing to get the sudden hoard of feral animals under control.

“What the hell did you do, man?” Sam yelled at Clint.

“I didn’t do anything! Why are you blaming this on me?”

“You’re the one that’s been messing with a literal God for the past week. You damn well know you said or did something to put him up to this.”

“Cats, cats, cats,” Barton muttered, swiping his fingers through his hair. “Oh shit. I think I know what set him off.”

“Well? Tell me, man, so you can apologize and get us the hell out of here!”

Clint just sat down on the top of the attraction, tugging Sam with him. “I think we’re going to be here a while.”

“What makes you say that? It’s boiling hot out here, you’re gonna turn red as a lobster!”

“Whipped. I told him he was pussy whipped.”

“What?”

“Loki. Pussy. Whipped.”

“Pussy,” Sam repeated, deadpan.

They slowly shared a look and cast their collective gaze to the growing sea of yowling cats extending out to the horizon.

“Shit.”

“You can say that again.”


End file.
